Sundowner
A man I know forgot who he was
the last time he was alive
and so did I.
He forgot all the things he said
he’d do differently;
all the things he’d do
instead.
The birds beneath my feet carry sand
around the coast
and I walk
In leather boots coated in their
shit.
Then I look up:
an eagle
Is teaching her young to fly
in the sky’s waves
tumbling together.
I forget who taught me how
to ride a bike
tumbling together.
I forget all the things I said
I’d do differently;
all the things I’d do
` instead.
I let the sun go down on me
while I think about
the moon.
The sky is getting old
the eagle is too
so is the man
so am I.
And I can’t remember who I was
the last time I was
alive.
The Bear
I came home to a bear in my house
Eating an apple and calling me Goldilocks
So I laughed: how nice you are
Friendly hungry bear
He came back, spilled milk
Throughout my life to give me something to
Cry about, and it worked, and I cried and the
Poor fattening bear clawed at my poems and
Laughed at the muddy pages
The growing bear flew head-on at my golden little tomcat
Throwing him to the rain with a kink in his tail —
And a gruesome growl
I sat trapped beneath the weight of this unbearable
Bear on my lap, begging for more of everything I’ve got
All the while he's laughing and calling me Goldilocks
So I shave my head and shoot the bastard
Crying for I knew he didn't mean it
But he’ll never know I didn't mean it either
And the winter will pass with an innocent death at my feet
And the endless thoughts of how I could’ve done better
Until next summer when my hair has grown back
And I leave fresh apples on the table for another starving bear
Winter Dreaming
A dream only remains a dream
under the covers
cool skin warmed by thumbprints
and breath
Hair tangled and tossed
as the winter wind rolls through
the cat’s window
purring at their feet
The blue sun rises and the bed
is empty
the dream a faded memory
of their future
Lonesome rituals pass forlorn days
thoughts of saints drift river nights
empty palms lay gaping by
empty sides
Roadkill Sunrise
I k i l l e d a bird
watching the
sunrise on
the highway
and I cried.
The sunrise
was beautiful
I was
n e r v o u s
I was the bird
I was
b e a u t i f u l
I was the sun.
Haiku
Midnight moonlight drive
Sparks flying from my eyes
While you fetishize
Busker at the Liquore Store
Douglas
He says it means
from the dark waters
You can see it in the plaque on his teeth
And the yellow on his calloused fingers
You can hear it in the blues he belts
And in the rustle of small change in his pockets
But you’d never guess it
From the smile piercing his cheeks
On the coldest winter mornings
Draping sleepless nights
You’d never imagine
The waters could have been so dark
From the way he describes them
A transparent Caribbean blue
Reminiscent of his watering eyes
Douglas
from the dark waters
a man, defiantly light
Filth
Filthy are the words
You think the slime
You say disgust O
Shame in bed in head
All red a symbol for
Lust and sheep you
Weep off the balconies
Of languid lovers
Leap from atmospheric
Gutters pouring into
The ribbon streets
While you listen to
Your laundry listen
To your silence listen
For the sea wind
To break the tension
With a joke choke
Smoke and the sun
Comes out the town
Is clean green sheen
And you are still
Filth your eyes your
Mouth your fingernails
Filth maybe next time
Maybe next time
Maybe next time
You’ll run clean too
Down the manholes
Through asphalt potholes
Into the foaming ocean.
Secrecy
I can smell the hangover in my
Underarms
I can feel it in the dirt
Under my nails
I remember it in
Your mouth
All while I write this forbidden
Poem